Estimated reading time: 10 minutes
The concept of the Gray Man is a simple one that has been practiced in various formats amongst military and security personnel for years. Simply put, becoming the Gray Man is to blend into your surroundings, into society, without attracting notice or attention.
A Gray Man can move amongst crowds and city streets without passersby or onlookers taking any undue notice—it is to become entirely mundane, boring, and easily overlooked.
Becoming the Gray Man is the art of hiding in plain sight, of blending into your surroundings. You can think of it as a form of camouflage for populated urban areas.
For those who wish to survive in an urban environment when SHTF, avoiding confrontation and unnecessary attention will be a crucial survival technique. The more noticeable you are, the more of a target you become. A good analogy would be the way one would act to avoid being picked to answer a question in class—you do everything you can to meld into the rest of the crowd in the classroom.
The problem, for many, is that successfully becoming a Gray Man is much more complicated than they first think. Many of us have unique quirks or traits that help us stand out, and we become easy to remember when seen day after day. It takes practice and effort to blend in so well that one would have a hard time saying whether or not they had ever seen you before.
Want to save this post for later? Click Here to Pin It On Pinterest!
In this article, we will explore the concept of the Gray Man and how you can best go about adopting and practicing this idea. Most of the information here will be pulled from military OPSEC (Operational Security) manuals as well as guidelines for embassy workers in hostile environments.
By the end, you should have a much better idea of what becoming a Gray Man in an urban survival scenario will really entail.
The Art of Blending In
Blending in, in many ways, is an art form. It requires you to manipulate and play with the perceptions of others, and there is no single best way to go about it. Most of the information we list here will help you become nondescript, but there are indeed many ways to blend in, depending on the situation or scenario.
A good example of just how different these methods could be was brought up in another Gray Man article; they pointed out how by simply donning some construction vests, a couple of Vice News journalists were able to wander into several locations without being challenged. While not necessarily discreet, they made themselves easily overlooked.
The trick is in understanding how the brain works when identifying and scanning people. People will quickly notice the basics of what they see, and will need to make a direct effort to begin to pick out details. Change blindness is a phenomenon that demonstrates this nicely. You can literally switch people out mid-conversation with only a slight bit of confusion triggering in the other person.
To become the Gray Man, you need to begin to manipulate the subconsciousness of others. You must move, act, and look like the majority of people around you.
You become hard to key in on and more difficult to notice and describe by avoiding obvious colors, sounds, movements, and threat items.
Want to prep but not sure where to begin?
Click Here to Get Your FREE One Year Urban Survival Plan!
It goes beyond simply what you look like as well. It also includes your actions and demeanor. The best way to blend in with those around you is to have a purpose. People with purpose are moving; they have a goal. Match the social patterns of those around you and move with them. Look like you have a similar purpose.
Describing the Gray Man
As a mental practice, don your equipment, attitude, and attire of Gray Man persona. Then attempt to give a brief police description of what you look like. If you have a hard time putting down prominent features, then you are on the right track.
For example, compare this profile:
“He’s the man with the green trucker hat and the red shirt with a large cow on it. He had a military-style camo backpack on.”
To this one:
“He was about average height, with darker hair. He had a jacket on; it was maybe brown or greyish black. Something like that. I think he had a black bag or maybe a backpack with him.”
As you can see, one profile is much harder to describe, track down, and remember. Of course, the situation dictates as to what will blend in best, but you get the general idea.
Key Points of Keeping a Low Profile
Keeping a low profile is a skillset common to people like social workers, as well as intelligence officers and general overseas stations. There are a ton of resources and tips for avoiding undue attention and confrontation, and most of them will give you roughly the same advice. Most of the basics of blending in really come down to good situational awareness and common sense.
To Keep a Low Profile You Should:
- Avoid showing off supplies, luxury items, weapons, money, food, etc. Don’t look like a valuable target.
- Don’t engage in arguments or debates. Don’t get into disputes that show your political opinion.
- Don’t divulge information about you or your family to anyone. Create an alias if you must interact.
- Dress down. Don’t wear bright colors or designer clothes or accessories. Avoid wearing jewelry and other valuables.
- Wear footwear that you can quickly move and escape in. A survey of inmates showed that they would often target victims that were wearing shoes that would slow them down.
- Body language is critical and situational. Aim for friendly, confident, but moving with purpose or task.
- Understand what normal or acceptable behavior in the situation is. What do you see the locals doing? Imitate that.
Staying Equipped While Keeping a Low Profile
As a Gray Man, the equipment you can carry with you is naturally limited to items you can carry discreetly or concealed. Most EDC items can be carried discreetly, though you should spend extra time ensuring it stays hidden and concealed.
Practice wearing gear and weapons and quickly accessing them while wearing regular clothes and utilizing standard pockets. Those tactical khaki pants are often a big warning sign to anyone who knows what they are looking at. Get used to wearing a weapon under your armor in the small of your hip and wear clothes that ensure it stays hidden.
The Gray Home
Many of the same concepts used for your out-and-about activities should be applied to your home. You want the ability to slow and ward away enemies, but you don’t want security measures to draw undue attention. It is better to be out of sight than to be in a hard target when dealing with overwhelming force.
Some basic everyday tips:
- Control keys to access points strictly.
- Park your car in a locked garage.
- Shut the curtains in a room before turning on the lights.
- Use multiple points of access and egress.
What if you Cannot Blend In?
In some cases, you may not be able to blend in. For example, say you are 6’5″ and 300 pounds and people think of you as “the big guy” wherever you go. In these cases, you will need to make efforts to use the military method of “developing assets.”
Since you will not be able to blend in, you instead make an effort to get to know people in the local area—those that can help provide you with information and be a friendly set of eyes. These are people that you can base your temperament and actions around. If your friends are nervous or hesitant to be out and about, take it as a sign that today is not the day to be moving around outdoors.
Situational Awareness
Situational awareness could also be called “The art of not being in the wrong place at the wrong time.” This is the intuition to sense imminent danger and to know when to remove yourself from harm’s way. To be a successful Gray Man, you not only need to be able to operate in open view, but you should also know when it is time to leave an area.
Want to prep but not sure where to begin?
Click Here to Get Your FREE One Year Urban Survival Plan!
If you are a target, being aware of your surroundings may allow you to sense danger before it occurs.
“A potential assassin must choose a target, learn where the target is going to be, choose and secure a weapon, survey security, develop an attack plan, and consider whether and/or how to escape. Although not every attacker will engage in all of these activities and behaviors, most engage in several of them.”
– Page 13, Protective Intelligence and Threat Assessment Investigations
As the quote states, there are some necessities an attacker must take:
- First, they must choose a target. You avoid this by not being noticeable or an obvious target.
- Second, they need to know where you will be. You avoid this by being unpredictable and changing your routes.
- Third, they will need to survey and understand an area. This gives you an opportunity to notice them and if they are giving you increased attention.
Some key advice given to soldiers operating in a hostile urban area also applies to the Gray Man/SHTF scenarios. Here are some further tips for better situational awareness:
Look For:
- Unusual activity, or a lack of activity by locals, especially at times and places where they would normally be active.
- New locals in the area.
- A change in the amount and type of trash in an area.
- Sudden or unusual movements of vehicles or people.
- People following you or observing your comings and goings.
- Possible safe havens and escape routes.
Listen For:
- Unusual calm or silence.
- Running vehicles.
- Weapons discharge or racking.
Smell For:
- Cooking food that can indicate newcomers or hiding areas.
- The age of food or trash that can indicate new arrivals.
- Human waste that can indicate new arrivals.
Pay Careful Attention to:
- Has anything changed? Are there new locks on buildings? Are windows boarded up or previously boarded-up windows now open, indicating a change of use of a building?
- Formulating a plan of action for when a bomb explodes or there is gunfire nearby.
- Be sure your vehicle is in good condition and fueled in case you need to rely on evasive driving.
- Avoid using the same routes. Know multiple routes to and from essential sites.
- Avoid routine. Change your timetables and activities—exit buildings through different doors and at different times.
“Like a police officer ‘walking the beat’ in a neighborhood day after day, leaders and soldiers at all ranks and echelons must be able to recognize that something has changed and, if possible, why.”
– Page 2-6 of Soldier Surveillance and Reconnaissance manual
Stay Vigilant and Blend In
The bad guys strike when you seem the most relaxed and lazy with your security. Stay vigilant and ready. Doing all of this, while also maintaining a Gray Man persona will go a long way towards keeping you safe and under the radar when the SHTF.
Like this post? Don’t Forget to Pin It On Pinterest!
Sources Used in this Article
- SOLDIER SURVEILLANCE AND RECONNAISSANCE: FUNDAMENTALS OF TACTICAL INFORMATION COLLECTION
- Overseas Security Advisory Council: Security in Transit
- A SAFE TRIP ABROAD DEPARTMENT OF STATE PUBLICATION
- Protective Intelligence and Threat Assessment Investigations: A Guide for State and Local Law Enforcement Officials
- The benefits of being boring by Grant Rayner
- Tactical Training Reference Manual
I don’t blend in anywhere. I’m 6’3 ‘ and weigh about 330 pounds. I do use a cane at times due to bad knees. Every cap I’ve got has some kind of logo on it. I have a beard and mustache, both grey.
Though I do wear semi normal clothes, jeans, plain tee shirt and a denim outer shirt. I just don’t think I’m too blendable.
I cannot be a Gray Man, no matter what I do or how I dress. I’m 6’4″, 270lbs. I have silver/gray hair and striking(so I’m told) blue eyes. If I have short hair, I look military or a LEO, if I have long hair, I look like a biker(actually, I’ve been all three, at one point or another), and I have a couple of tat’s.No matter what, even at my age(60+ some), I attract attention, if only just a long glance. I walk quietly, and am frequently accused of “sneaking up” on folks. So, I’ve adopted the role of “Dont F*** With Me” Man. My hair is down to the middle of my back, have a very long beard(also gray),dark, innocuous t-shirts, jeans, boots, sometimes a hat and sunglasses(Rx, heh heh)and usually a weather related outer garment(another, untucked t-shirt, unbuttoned shirt, or jacket, primarily for concealing my sidearm usually with a”New York Reload”, and other edc I choose for the day. So far it has worked. I still get looks and glances, but they are a lot shorter. I don’t smile much in public, except at small childen, who will stare you down, and rarely am approached for conversation, and when I am, I speak quietly and straight to the point. It’s never been about a bluff, I can back it up in MOST cases, but I hope the day never comes when some young bucks decide to try the old man on. My mantras are the old sayings “Fight me if you wish, but remember, I’m old for a reason”, and, “I’m too old to fight, and too tired to run, so…….”. Hope it continues to work, because all I really want is to be left alone.
Danny spent 25 yrs as a cop..saw guys like you that blended in doing undercover work…old bulky coat…walking with a cane (that doubles as a club)..old hat…pushing a grocery cart…always think out of the box if you really have to kind of blend in there is always a way…
My problem is that I’m the only brown guy in town! Lol. It sucks! Can’t blend in anywhere!
Lose the TAN then! LOL
Even non whites get darker in the sunshine.
You could always get DARKER and go about at night time?
Should blend in pretty well then.
One of the most important things about achieving “greyman ” status is going to be your own ego . If you think you are , or actually are an alpha , DROP that posture right now . Being an alpha when you have or need to take control is a good thing . Alpha behavior gets noticed . Be aware of when that can be a detriment . The entire premise is to blend in .
If you are a wanna be alpha , you better be able to back it up . Others may be relying on you, truly know what and what not , you are really capable of. Physical weakness or fear are everyday conditions we have to live with . There is no failure in that . Failure will get those that pretend , but can’t when real world situations arise . This site is here to try and prepare you . If you are not seriously preparing to do the things you must , because your ego may get hurt , you are not prepared.
That’s some of the best advice that people could/should take.
It’s entirely possible that police and or military may be the greater threat to our well being. Something to consider, that being grey or even invisible…be a high priority. WROL situation, could be a military coup or an illegal use of martial law powers.
Generally the grey man idea is garbage.
Other than you do not want to be looking way out of place.
The problem is that if you are to plain, you will be noticed. Maybe not by everyone, but by me and others that you would not want to notice you. You will only appear to “blend in”, to the other “sheep” or to unwary, unskilled predators.
For instance in the video he brings up caps with some thing on them, a logo, a patch, etc.
99 % of the caps out there have something like that on them. Although everybody notices it, that it is not remarkable. However a cap with out anything on it, is very remarkable and memorable.
So which is more “grey” ?
Who is more noticed the guy that never speaks, or the one who does not say a lot but is not terribly silent either. A lot of the “Grey Man” thinking, over thinks what is ” grey”. Just being normal is being “grey”, for the most part. Trying to go unnoticed WILL get you noticed. Because no one can do it well enough.
By looking like one of the ” sheep”, you are also looking like a victim to any predator that is out there.
Predators do not attack other predators, they attack the average, the vulnerable.
This applies to everyday life, but gets even more enhanced post SHTF.
The chances of being, sick or injured (at some point) in a SHTF scenario are greatly increased. So if you are dress out as a “sheep”, you are now looking like an “injured sheep”, the perfect prey.
Now a predator’s first choice is always one of these, unless it is recognized as another predator or a dangerous choice to attack, at any time.
Something to think about.
The next problem is one of mentality. All of these guys think they know what every one will be dressing like or carrying post SHTF, but will they really?
How many people will be wearing Camo? How many will have regular Back packs? Military Back packs? Tactical vests? Weapons? Etc?
No one really knows, so how are you going to plan to blend in?
Some of this will be area specific, so if you are forced to travel, to relocate, what makes you a “grey man” may change. In the Country, everyone might be wearing blue jeans, western hats and pistols or hunting attire and rifles. But they probably will not be looking like that, in the City.
So by not having acquired these things prior to SHTF, you can no longer be a “grey man”, because your wrong choices, ( wrong mentality), will make you stand out!
The Grey man stuff is better suited to current spies and undercover operatives, than to Post SHTF operations.
I tend to agree. That’s why it’s always good to have your sheep dogs dressed as sheep for when the predators arrive.
This is how I see it too…. A grey man isn’t a sheep, they are a planned act, a wolf in sheep’s clothing. Or a house dog at least.
While they look like everything else, there’s a key difference I’d suggest Mic might have missed… the Grey Man-Sheep is there by intent, not accident. They are also aware of their surroundings and there should be many subtle signs that they are not sheep.
They might have ear buds in, but won’t be listening, instead they’ll be listening to their surrounds, so when you start to tail them they slightly alter their behaviour and suddenly don’t appear as vulnerable.
They might be wearing that cap with no logo on it, but when you start trying to tail them they lose the cap in a sudden swirl of crowd and now have a hoodie up and you lose them. And the no-logo cap was because they aren’t carrying an entire costume warehouse on their travels, just a 90% good enough approximation of most things in a few simple items.
A sheep that looks vulnerable isn’t going to be a competent grey man. A competent grey man knows how to look like a sheep but walk just a little stronger, stay out of the risky areas as they amble along and avoid the conflict they can see up ahead. They won’t have 100% safety, but they won’t be as vulnerable. Part of Grey Man Tactics is coupling it with urban movement/situational awareness techniques. Ambling slowly across the road in no particular hurry Could be to avoid that dead street light over an empty parking lot that just had a cigarette crushed underfoot in it…. you might see someone casually wandering across a road, they might be actively avoiding a likely mugging.
To assume that all sheep are sheep is to show your own weakness. Many sheep will be somewhere between household dog and wolf, who have learnt the value of looking like sheep. And not all dogs worry the sheep/are predators, many will be guard dogs/Maremma too.
Some of you seem quite clueless about real life.
A real predator will know that Sheep Dogs are there( even if not in plain sight) and “sniff’ them out.
A good criminal knows when cops are around, even when they can’t see them. The same goes for military personnel, they can “smell” an ambush. Women are often great at detecting both “creeps” and “protectors”.
A Human’s 6th sense or intuition will reveal the presence of what they are on the look out for.
Then it is only a matter of looking for tell tale signs, to confirm it.
Like a person looking too “grey”, trying to hard not to be noticed, not looking odd enough.
Normal people look odd. They dress odd, They act odd. Trying to “blend in”, tends to make you stand out.
If all else fails, during SHTF, one could fire off a round, and see how everyone reacts; you would quickly know who the sheep dogs are.
Then a predator would know who to target, first. When they are ready to attack.( You should realize that a good predator (or group of them) will size your group up, figure out your strengths and weaknesses, long before they actually attack you.)
You see there is no way to hide, you may some what blend in (be a grey man) some of the time, but not all of the time. Your actions and instincts will betray you.
Becoming the invisible man, women, person. In our so called techo society with every kind of way to track you, aka ipads, ipods, lap tops, computers, automated billing systems of every kind, camera’s all over the place, satellite technology, e-mails all over the place and so on and so on it becomes more and more difficult. It remembers me of the episode on Star Trek, 1960’s titled I Mudd in which the android’s would take over the galaxy by serving all, aka humans and others. Once they were all being served they then would be dependent and controlled by the android’s forever.
Long ago and far away some wise man said of becoming the Gray Man: “If you live in the ocean, you must become a fish.” If you can follow this reasoning it makes perfect sense. Do, look, speak, act and smell as those around you.
The problem with looking like a fish, is that it makes you food for sharks and other creatures.
Fish give predators a wide berth, so do most other predators,(try studying predator behavior).
It is easier to attack a fish, rather than another shark.
So all you are doing is making your self into prey and hoping that you do not get in the group that gets eaten. Not a real bright idea, IMO.
It is true that the fish don’t notice you, if you look like you are another fish, but then they were never a threat to you in the first place.
I think that put the Grey man thinking in it’s proper perspective.
Then be a dolphin. They are adored by all yet feared by sharks.
Get the book by Matthew Dermody. Worthwhile and you can hold it in your hands.
Some of this practical info, you’re gonna want to print up now, make a place to keep them.
Just because you read and have knowledge… members of your family/group may not and if you’re incapacitated….well, everyone’s screwed.
We have books, papers…so that the wife won’t be too freaked out if something happens to me. We also frequently camp …she knows about shelter and firemaking…
She doesn’t like the guns, but knows how to use them.
same here please not so many vids
What good is a video on blending into the crowd going to do when the SHTF and we’re without computers or even electricity? If I can’t print out a matching article, there’s no point in watching because I can’t possibly remember all the tips that are published daily on the ‘Net.
Danny, the video is for those that have decided the printed word is too much effort . As a “Boomer” laws taught to read , actual fully spelled out words . Contractions were done using an apostrophe between the last few letters . Now wh are down to 3 or 4 single letters acting as a sentence. If the dedication does impact the ventilation very few of the younger generation will be able to use a real book , for more than sanitary purposes . You obviously have a full understanding of the limits of technology.